It hit me today that this is the third to the last episode. That we only have one week left of this amazing show! ... TWIN PEAKS: I am the FBI

It hit me today that this is the third to the last episode. That we only have one week left of this amazing show!  I’m not ready for it to be over. I want more and more of all characters, both old and new. It makes me so glad that we are getting some resolutions, like finally Big Ed and Norma getting to love each other. However, there is still more to answer, like, is this stuff with Audrey a dream?  Is she in a coma?  Or is this real?  Each week I am so excited to see what is going to happen next, so here we go!

Twin Peaks: The Return Part 16

Headlights shine on a darkened highway. Bad Cooper (Kyle MacLachlan) and Richard (Eamon Farren) are on their way to somewhere. Neither says a word. However, Richard keeps taking a look at the man he recognized as Special Agent Dale Cooper. The truck comes to a fork in the road. Bad Cooper pulls over and parks. He shines the trucks lights up at a large rock on the hill next to them. Richard asks “Now what?” Bad Cooper tells Richard he is looking for a place. Three people have given him the coordinates to the place. Two of them matched. The two that match are for the rock at the top of the hill.

Jerry Horne (David Patrick Kelly) comes bounding over the hill behind Bad Cooper and Richard. He is surprised to see people. He pulls out his binoculars and, looking through the wrong end, he sees two figures making their way up the hill toward the rock. The two figures, of course, being Bad Cooper and Richard reach the rock. Bad Cooper tells Richard that being 25 years his junior, Richard needs to go check it out.

Bad Cooper hands Richard a GPS and tells him it will beep as he gets close and make a continuous tone when he’s on it. Richard moves toward and then onto the rock. As he climbs on to the rock, the GPS begins to beep. When it does change to a continuous tone, Richard suddenly appears to be getting electrocuted. As the electricity shoots through him, he begins to disappear until only his head is left for a moment before it explodes into sparks. For a moment, Bad Cooper has a look of disappointment. But then he says “Good-bye, my son,” before heading back down to the truck.

Watching through his binoculars, Jerry drops them and falls to the ground when he sees Richard vanish.  He begins smashing them with a rock and repeatedly saying, “Bad binoculars, bad!” At the truck Bad Cooper attempts to send a text of a smiley face and the word ALL.  However, the message doesn’t go through yet. Bad Cooper gets back in his truck.

Where are Bad Cooper and Richard going? Did they talk on the way like Bad Cooper said they would in last week’s episode? Are we going to get to know what they talked about? I don’t think so. What is this place they have stopped at? Is it an entrance to the lodge? Bad Cooper mentions that he got coordinates from three different people. One would have been Hastings secretary. Is the other one Jeffries?  And who else?  And why do only two match?  I am so glad to see Jerry!  However, he better watch himself so that Bad Cooper and Richard don’t see him spying on them with his upside-down binoculars. Richard best watch himself around Bad Cooper.   Especially when Bad Cooper had Richard go check out the “place” on his own. And now there is no more Richard?  And of course, to acknowledge what was said by Bad Cooper, apparently, Richard is his son.    Did he impregnate Audrey to spawn essentially a Guinea pig to find out if the “place” was safe?  What is this “place”?  Back to poor Jerry who has been alone in the woods for few days and now is witness to Richard disappearing. What does the text mean that Bad Cooper sent?  What a fantastic opening scene for this week.

Chantal (Jennifer Jason Leigh) and Hutch (Tim Roth) park their van across the street from the Jones home. They sit in the back of the van waiting while Chantal eats Cheetos. Before long Agents Headley (Jay R. Ferguson) and Wilson (Owain Rhys Davies) along with a couple of other FBI agents pull and knock on the door. Wilson tries to look through the window as Headley knocks on the door. Headley is not impressed by Wilson conclusion that no one is home. Headley tells Wilson to get a car to stake out the house while he goes to Lucky 7 insurance. Chantal is not sad to see them go.

I always love a scene with Hutch and Chantal. And I love how they are sitting there watching the scene play out like we are with the FBI coming to get Dougie. But alas, there is no Dougie Jones to take in.  Instead, poor Wilson is getting yelled at again.   He better no screw anything else up, or he will be fired! 

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Janey-E (Naomi Watts) and Sonny Jim (Pierce Gagnon) sit by Cooper’s bedside at the hospital when Bushnell Mullins (Don Murray) arrives.  He comments on “Dougie’s” good vital signs. Sonny Jim asks him mom if the coma has anything to do with electricity. She says no but Bushnell tells him that in this case it does. Bushnell pats Janey-E on the shoulder as the three of them look at the unconscious Cooper. They are soon joined by the Mitchum Brothers, Rodney (Robert Knepper) and Bradley (James Belushi), as well as, Candie (Amy Shiels), Sandie (Giselle DaMier), and Mandie (Andréa Leal). They came as soon as they heard. Bushnell introduces them to Janey-E and Sonny Jim. Janey-E thanks them for their kindness and tells Sonny Jim, they are the ones that bought his gym set for him as well as the new car.

Knowing that people in these situations forget to eat, they’ve brought food along with them including finger sandwiches. They announce they are not staying they just wanted to drop off the food and ask Janey-E for her house keys so they can go and stock their house. She thanks them again and hands over the keys. Bradley comments that Cooper looks good.

The entire time here at the hospital, I am waiting and waiting for Cooper to wake up. I also like how Janey-E states that when someone goes into a coma, they can stay in it for years. Is she letting us the audience know that Audrey is in a coma? Or now, Cooper is going to be in a coma? Is he ever going to come out of it? This whole scene was great with the Mitchum Brothers coming to bring flowers and food and making sure that Dougie and his family were being taken care of. Those guys are so different than I thought they would be, but I should have known better watching a Lynch/Frost show that the characters are not always what they seem.

At the hotel in Buckhorn, SD, Gordon Cole (David Lynch) stands in their command post deep in thought.

What is Gordon listening to, just the sounds of the room? I am so glad to have a lot of Gordon Cole in this show.

When Sonny Jim says he needs to pee, his mother takes him to find the restroom. Bushnell stays in the room with Cooper. He phone rings. It’s a call from Phil (Josh Fadem) at the office letting him know that the FBI had just been there looking for Dougie. Bushnell is stunned wondering why since he’s in a coma, what could he have possibly done. Phil told the FBI that Dougie’s in a coma at the hospital. Phil tells Bushnell they left about ten minutes ago.

We cut back to the hospital and I am waiting for Cooper to wake up. Are you going to? The answer is no.

Back outside of Dougie’s house, Chantal grabs another package of Cheetos of the dashboard.  Down the street, Agent Wilson pulls up in an SUV with his stakeout partner.  Soon and again to Chantal and Hutch’s surprise, the Mitchum’s Limo pulls into the Jones’ driveway with a delivery truck not far behind. As they get out, Hutch asks if one of them is Dougie. Chantal asks if any of them look like their boss Bad Cooper, which they don’t do therefore not Dougie. Hutch comments on her Cheeto eating; which causes her to snip back that it’s the last bag.  He follows up by asking if she’s “on the rag.”  She yells back, “What if I fucking was!?”

Wilson also determines Douglas Jones was not with them.

Suddenly a Polish accountant (Jonny Coyne), who lives in the house Hutch and Chantal are parked in front of, pulls up in front of their van. He gets out and tells them to move because they are blocking his driveway. When they insist they are not in his driveway and yell at him to go away, he agrees that he will go move his car. However, when he starts up his car, he drives straight into their bumper and tries desperately to push their van with his little sedan.

Chantal gets mad about this and leans out the window with her gun firing a shot through the accountant’s window. The accountant jumps out of his car and scurries to the trunk. He pulls an Uzi out and fires a shot that hits Chantal in the left arm. Hutch tells her to get them out of there. Before she does, however, she rams the accountant’s car knocking him to the ground. As they drive past him, he gets up and switching the gun to automatic, sprays the driver’s side with bullets. Chantal is hit several times and slumps over.  Her foot falls of the gas and the van drifts down the street with the horn blaring.

The accountant changes clips as the Mitchum brothers, guns drawn, cautiously come out of the Jones’ home. The accountant begins firing again at the back doors of the van filling Hutch full of holes. He empties the second clip and watches as the van drives slowly to the end of the street as Hutch collapses inside. Bradley asks Rodney what kind of neighborhood this is. Rodney replies that these people are under a lot of stress.

The van comes to a stop when it hits a pole, popping the hood and starting a fire in the engine. Agent Wilson and his partner spring out of their vehicle, identifying themselves as FBI, they order the accountant to put down his weapon. Rodney decides this would be a good time for them to put their guns away, get the girls, and get out of there. The accountant does as he’s told and puts his hands in the air as Wilson calls for paramedics.

This scene was crazy with both the FBI and Chantal/Hutch staking out the house. And the neighbor who obviously is crazy himself carrying a gun and just shooting up the place. I loved the Mitchum Brothers surprise to all of this going on and just chalking it up to people being stressed. At least Wilson did not screw this up, but we did loose Chantal and Hutch. I will sure miss them.

Back at the hospital, Bushnell begins hearing a strange tone that leads him out of Cooper’s room. The image of Gerard (Al Strobel) appears on the chair next to his bed as Cooper’s eyes open.  He pulls the tube from his mouth and sits up quickly. Cooper stares at Gerard who says “You are awake.” Cooper replies “One hundred percent.”  Gerard fills Cooper in about Bad Cooper. He gives Cooper the ring. Cooper asks Gerard if he has the seed. Gerard holds up the small gold ball that was left behind when Dougie disappeared from the Black Lodge. Cooper pulls out a couple strands of his own hair and handing them to Gerard asks if he can make another one. Gerard takes the hairs says that he understands. Gerard studies them and then puts them in his pocket before fading away.

Janey-E and Sonny Jim come back in the room and are delighted to see Cooper sitting up in bed. They rush over to him and he embraces them. Bushnell comes back in equally delighted to see the change in condition. Cooper sends Janey-E and Sonny Jim to find a doctor. He asks Bushnell to pass him some of those sandwiches. Bushnell tells him the FBI came by the office looking for him. Cooper responds, “Perfect.” The doctor (Bellina Logan) arrives protesting him pulling out his IV and other connections. He asks her to confirm that his vitals are A-Okay and that’s it’s a good idea for him to go. She agrees. Cooper has Janey-E go get the car and wait for him out front. He asks Bushnell to hand him his clothes.

As Janey-E and Sonny Jim head for the car, Sonny Jim mentions that “dad” sure is talking a lot now. Janey-E agrees. Back in the room, Cooper asks Bushnell for the gun he carries in the holster under his left arm. Bushnell hands it over no question. Wanting to know if can help, Cooper tells Bushnell to get the Mitchum brothers on the line. Bushnell calls their personal number they gave him. Handing the phone off to Cooper, he tells Rodney that he needs to meet them in the lobby of the casino and then they need to fly to Spokane, WA. Rodney assures him they are gassing up the jet right now.  Rodney hangs up and tells Bradley.  As Bradley tells the girls they are going for a plane ride, the familiar strains of “Falling” begin to play on the soundtrack.

Now fully dressed in his black suit, Cooper tells Bushnell that a man name Gordon Cole is likely to call. He gives him a note to read to Gordon when he calls. Bushnell asks him “But what about the FBI?” Cooper turns and, as the music swells, he says with a smile “I am the FBI.”

Outside he walks up to the car and tells Janey-E to slide over because he’s going to drive. Sonny Jim is delighted to see his father driving again. As the drive away, Agent Headley and the Las Vegas FBI drive up. Cooper tells Janey-E they are going to the Silver Mustang to see the Mitchum Brothers. She stares at him, even more attracted to him than she has ever been.

COOPER IS AWAKE!!! Also, COOPER IS BACK!!! He is the FBI!!!  I am so beyond excited; I don’t even know how to explain it. It felt like this was it this week, considering too how many times we kept cutting back to the hospital room in this episode.  And is the humming that Bushnell hears the same as what we have been hearing throughout this entire season?  What is that noise? Is it whenever the Black Lodge appears? Apparently too Mike will make a copy of Cooper with the gold seed and pieces of hair he handed him. Is he making another Dougie? What is happening here? I like how Sonny-Jim seems to be the only one picking up on the fact that his dad is talking a lot now. And everyone is going to Spokane!  When the Twin Peaks theme begun, I said out loud “Twin Peaks is starting” and I half expected for us to cut to the Packard Saw Mill, and the original opening credits.  What is the message that Cooper is leaving for Gordon?  With the LV FBI showing up, is Wilson going to be blamed for Cooper leaving? What will happen next? I AM SO EXCITED RIGHT NOW!!!

In Buckhorn, Diane (Laura Dern) sits at the bar as the music continues to plays. It halts the moment she looks at her phone and sees the message “:  -) ALL.” Diane gets a terrified look on her face. As she goes to put the phone away in her purse, she sees something in the purse that causes her great concern.  She takes a drink, then shudders, and exhales “I remember. Oh, Coop. I remember.” Trembling, she picks up her phone again. Typing in a series of numbers she says out loud to herself, “I hope this works.” She looks down at a handgun in her purse. Closing the purse quickly, she stands up as Muddy Magnolia’s “American Woman (Remix)” begins thundering on the soundtrack.

She makes her way through the hotel and upstairs to room 1827 where Gordon is waiting with Tammy (Chrysta Bell) and Albert (Miguel Ferrer) in their FBI command post. She approaches the door and stands in front of it. The music ends and without even a knock, Gordon tells her to come in.  She enters and sits down across from the three agents. Albert fixes her a drink and she proceeds to tell them about the night she last saw Cooper.

She pulls a pack of cigarettes out of her purse; eyeing the handgun a she does so. Diane tells them that that it was about 3 or 4 years after she stopped hearing from Cooper. She was still at the bureau when she found him one night standing in her living room. She was so happy to see him. They held each other close as they sat on the sofa. She wanted to hear about where he had been and what he had been doing. But he only wanted to know about the bureau. He practically interrogated her before leaning in to kiss her. They had kissed once before but this time something was wrong about it. She became afraid and he seemed to know it. He smiled at her and there was something about his face as he began raping her. Afterwards he took her to “an old gas station.”

Diane stops speaking and sees the message again on her phone. She begins exhaling deeply and her eyes widen. She starts repeating with a sense of realization, “I’m in the Sheriff’s station. I’m in the Sheriff’s station.”  She pauses for a moment and grows pained as she tries to speak her thoughts. Finally she is able to say, “I’m not me. I’m not me.” She begins sobbing. Albert and Tammy slowly begin reaching for their guns. Against her will Diane suddenly grabs her s from her purse but before she can fire, Albert and Tammy shoot her. She vanishes to the sky, leaving behind her chair now sporting a couple of bullet holes. Tammy and Albert are stunned. She can’t believe they’re real, Diane was a real tulpa. All the while Gordon remained nonplussed before asking the question, “Sheriff’s station?”

What are you involved with Diane? Does that text mean you are now going to go kill Gordon? And Albert and Tammy? I don’t think any of them would be dead, for we have the Secret History Book with all of Tammy’s notes.   And Diane is now sending coordinates and mutter to herself that she hopes this works.   Where is, she sending Bad Cooper to? Did you notice that first few numbers there were the same as what Jefferies was giving Bad Cooper to find Judy?   Who is Judy?  Does Diane know Judy?  My heart is racing with every step that Diane takes.   And in this scene, after she tells all of them how Bad Cooper attached her, she disappeared to the Black Lodge.   Is she even Diane?  Where is the real Diane?!? And is the sheriff station in question Twin Peaks?

Much like Dougie early in the season, Diane now finds herself seated in the green chair in front of Gerrard. He tells her “Someone manufactured you.”  In contrast to Dougie’s confusion, Diane replies “I know. Fuck you.”  She begins contorting and her face cracks apart. Blackness spews out along with a golden ball. Gerard covers his as with a flash of electricity she is gone, leaving only the golden seed behind.

Oh, Diane, don’t say Fuck You to Mike, the life will get sucked out of you and cause you to turn into a gold seed.

The Mitchums are excited to see Cooper and family come through the door. They can’t believe how good he looks. Rodney announces the plane is all gassed up and ready to go. Janey-E asks where they are going. Cooper excuses himself from the MItchums for a word with his family. As they walk away, Bradley comments that “Dougie” appears to be speaking with great assurance. Rodney wonders if it has to do with the coma. Bradley realizes it must be side effects.

Cooper tells Sonny Jim and Janey-E that he has to go away for a while but he wanted to tell them how much he enjoyed spending time with them. They look at him with uncertainty.  He tells them they are family and Dougie, which he quickly corrects to say I will be back.  Janey-E looks him in the eye and asks “You’re not Dougie?” Stunned, Sonny Jim says “No. You’re my dad! You’re my dad!” Cooper reassures him he is his dad and he loves them.  He says they’ll him again soon. Cooper begins to leave but Janey-E runs over to him pleading for him not to go. He tells her he has to. She studies his eyes and face. She kisses him deeply and says, “Whoever you are, thank you.” He walks back to the Mitchum brothers and as they head out of the casino Janey-E holds Sonny Jim as tears fill her eyes.

Cooper loves this family and he wants to make sure they are ok. The Dashing Agent Dale Cooper, what a guy!

In the back of the Mitchums’ limo they are trying to understand what Cooper is telling them. He has explained that he is not insurance but with the FBI and he needs them to help get him to the Sheriff station in a town called Twin Peaks.  They are apprehensive because they are not usually welcome in such places or by law enforcement types. He assures him that is about to change because he is witness to the fact that they both have hearts of gold.

The Mitchum Brothers are great and seem to take the situation rather well that they are in. And Cooper will make sure that everyone knows that they have hearts of gold. I cannot wait to see this groups adventures in Twin Peaks.

The M.C. (J.R. Starr) at the Roadhouse introduces the night entertainment, Edward Louis Severson III (Eddie Vedder).  He performs the song “Out of Sand.” As the performance is going on, Audrey (Sherilyn Fenn) and Charlie (Clark Middleton) finally arrive at the much discussed Twin Peaks landmark.  As they walk in Audrey scans the place looking for Billy while Charlie tries to get the attention of the bartender.  As they sit at the bar, the song comes to an end.  The bartender delivers them their martinis. Charlie raises his glass to toast to them. Audrey raises hers and toasts to Billy.

The M.C. returns to stage and introduces “Audrey’s Dance.”  Audrey looks around confused as all the patrons clear the floor and the five piece band begins to play the deep sultry notes of the song. Like a woman possessed, Audrey rises from her seat and dances out to the middle of the floor.  The crowd silently sways in unison. But the mood is shattered when a man (Scott Cameron) crosses the room and hits another man (Richard Bucher) with a bottle angry that the second man is with his wife.

Visibly shaken and upset, Audrey runs over to Charlie, grabbing him and saying “Get me out of here.” At once, Audrey finds herself staring into a mirror at a reflection that looks almost nothing like the woman who was just dancing. Stunned she asks “What!? Wha-what!?”

Eddie Vedder, you did not fool anyone. We knew it was you.  At least it was not ZZ Top again.   And why are Audrey and Charlie here?  Is this not a dream?  Is she not in a coma? However, when “Audrey’s Dance” started, I thought again that this is not real.   And I was right!  But where is she?!?! Are we going to find out next week?

As the credits roll, the band resumes playing “Audrey’s Dance,” this time Black Lodge style.

Final Thoughts

 Only next week and then it’s over … but my hopes are that it is not over forever.   That we will get a Season 4.   Upside is that next week is two episodes and a lot can happen. This has been such a thrilling summer for me to be able to watch this show again in first run. I am going to miss it a lot, and I am sure you will too. Who knows what is in store for us next Sunday, but whatever it is, I am sure it will be amazing!!!

Join me here next week for the season finale recap and discussion. The 2 hour season finale of Twin Peaks airs Sunday at 8 pm on Showtime.'

Amantha Ryan

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