Kicking Zombie Ass for Jesus was probably a better title.

A miracle pill intended to save the world causes unforeseen side-effects forcing the surviving gays and bible thumpers in a small Texas town to join forces or fall prey to the flesh craving mutants

aka Kicking Zombie Ass for Jesus. “In a zombie apocalypse the only survivors are gay people and church people, Lord help us all.”

Horrorbuzz, what have you gotten me into?

Okay, I have my coffee and my SAD lamp and antidepressants. I can get through this.

Go ahead, Israel Luna, surprise me. Be as good as Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter. Or Otto; or Up With Dead People. See also Ze, Zombie.

In the not-too-distant future, a pill is invented that makes you immune to all viral infections, including HIV/AIDS. On the day of its release, a large group of LGBT people are taking the pill while churches are protesting because they say AIDS is a God-created curse on Gays.

We cut to a preacher, Reverend Samuel Jefress (Richard D. Curtin) wearing what looks like a Rip Taylor wig, standing with his wife, Janice (Krystal Summers) in front of their church, wondering where their congregation went. Meanwhile, their son Jessie (Gerald Crum) is exchanging texts with his boyfriend.

Members of the congregation finally approach, but they are zombies, and they must fight for their lives.

Meanwhile, Beth-Anne Fetterman (Willam Belli) — pronounced like Beth Amphetamine — is having troubles of her own, being attacked by her coworker. She escapes and meets the Jefresses and they hole up together in an empty house to survive the oncoming hordes of zombies. Throughout the film, the characters clash on the subject of the sinfulness of homosexuality but must pull together to survive.

Gay Love in the Time of Zombies.

This is from the makers of Ticked-Off Trannies with Knives. Kind of milking the exploitation revival? Is Queersploitation a word yet? Well, it is now. Oh God, I just remembered┬áCurse of the Queerwolf from long ago… man I hated that film. There is liberal use of slurs, so be ready. Also an uncareful use of pronouns. In fact, there’s a general mishmash of terms, and everyone is just “gay,” even though Beth-Anne appears to be a drag queen or a trans woman (at one point referred to as a “transistor”), Phil (Angel Martinez) is a butch lesbian or a trans man (Phil is referred to as both “Sir” and “she” at different times).

Some of the use of slurs is reclamation, but some is not. I mean, there’s a whole lot of discourse on the topic of reclaimed slurs, and there’s not enough room to even dip our toes into it here, but this film come across as simply careless. Which, you know, a lot of the LGBT community tends to be. But not all. No, not all.

As a conceit, the film has old worn-film grain, and there is a missing reel in the middle. I don’t know if this is clever and meta or simple laziness.

This has more going for it that you’d expect at first look. There were themes of forgiveness, hypocrisy, redemption, love both familial and otherwise. And actually some good acting.

Despite the tagline, it’s not actually Christians vs Gays vs Zombies. The Christians are not irredeemably homophobic, the gays are not totally … Christophobic? Am I okay coining words? I sure am.

I don’t know for sure who this is for, but I don’t think it’s for straight people. But it’s fun enough, if you don’t think too hard about it, and if those danged t-slurs don’t set you off. It’s even funny sometimes.

The Dead Don’t Die in Dallas
RATING: UR
Runtime: 1 hr 31 Mins.
Directed By:
Written By: