This found-footage dull whimper purports to be a creepy tale of real demonic possession kept under wraps for years as “many found it disturbing,” but really it’s two guys filming random life minutiae for an hour (sometimes in pitch black) bookended by a couple of humorously foolish press conference scenes that make no sense. Let me stress right away this is simply a Paranormal Activity knockoff where things the characters consider minorly spooky–but aren’t–occasionally happen before the suggestion of a climax and that’s all folks.

Detective Sanchez (Adam Berardi) briefs a press room full of passionate reporters on latest developments in the suspicious deaths of Greg Sanders (Clay Moffatt) and Brian Mills (Joe Pacini) before found-footage reveals what the two of them were up to days leading to their demise and how demonic possession factors in.

Hey look, *another* movie that goes the route of outright telling us in the first few minutes how things end as though that information itself adds mystery/tension/etc to anything. Knowing that bad things eventually happen doesn’t equal insta-pathos and absolve a movie from even attempting to be interesting or eventful until it’s damn near over. In terms of The Last Five Days in particular, the overwhelming majority of what’s offered is just scene after scene of Greg & Brian hanging out, talking about whatever, filming rocks/sticks/fruit/a napkin, wondering aloud “what the dealio is,” being perturbed by a baking sheet falling down (the horrors!!), or other riveting developments like those with maybe 90 seconds of actual happenings at the last possible moment. 

An in media res opening (e.g. Annihilation, Fight Club, & John Wick among countless others) doesn’t automatically mean the movie is doomed, by the way, and can certainly be used quite effectively but those that do remember to hold things back. Leave something for the audience to discover along the way or catch up to that moment sooner rather than later so there’s more to the story or mix it up *somehow* (see Hannibal’s S2 premiere and finale for masterful execution of an in media res setup & delivery)–especially this brand of found-footage which is mostly built-up to one big end reveal. The Last Five Days has no build-up and also no reveal, so why bother?

Also, I have no idea if it was intentional (an odd choice if so) but the main characters’ names, Greg Sanders & Brain Mills, certainly ring a couple bells–”Greg Sanders” was a character on CSI for 15 years with “Bryan Mills” being Liam Neeson’s character from the Taken franchise. Pointless trivia, yay! Anyway, If you noticed I didn’t go on about the movie itself too much but this is my design since there’s just not much meat on these bones. Who might enjoy this? Hmm…I really can’t imagine anyone genuinely finding this worth the time. Even if your bar for found-footage frights is barely at ankle-level get ready to be disappointed.

 

1 out of 10 Pre-used Character Names

The Last Five Days
RATING: NR
Runtime: 1 Hr. 11 Mins.
Directed By:
Clay Moffatt
Written By:
Clay Moffatt and Joe Pacini

About the Author

Adem lives with his husband, dog(s), & cat(s) in an Arizonian city where any time not spent with/on the previously mentioned creatures is filled with writing, rowing, baking, and whatever else the day brings.