Despite its valiant effort at entertainment, the only suspense filled moment in the film Cargo was wondering when the film would end.

Rich shady businessman Anthony Peterson (Ron Thompson) wakes up in a cargo-shipping container and receives an ominous call from his captors informing Anthony that he must wire 10 million dollars to them or they will rape and murder his wife and then murder him. Anthony then goes on several desperate cellular errands in an attempt to gather the necessary funds to appease his kidnappers and gain revenge on those who have wronged him. As the film progresses, more is revealed about Anthony but the conclusion is the same. The film is almost as awful as he is.

This movie felt like a really benign uninteresting Saw. Anthony Peterson even mildly resembles the man behind Jigsaw (Tobin Bell). Coincidence perhaps but the connection was made nonetheless. Despite the resemblance, the acting quality was in no way similar. Being the primary focus of a film can present its unique challenges, but Thompson’s portrayal of a man in an extremely desperate situation was nothing short of lackluster.  In one specific instance, after Anthony receives the phone call from his captors and realizes the seriousness of his situation, he does what any sane person would do and begins to bang on the walls and scream for help. Did I say that’s what he does? Excuse me I misspoke, that’s what he SHOULD HAVE done. Anthony barely hits the walls and his cries for help rival those of a person who has been minorly inconvenienced. I’ve seen more anger from people who received the wrong order at Chili’s.  Occasionally moments of emotional interest would appear and Thompson would squash it like a bug, ensuring the performance was as benign and vanilla as possible. And his overuse of the word “man” throughout the film filled me with more rage than rush hour traffic in L.A.

Throughout the course of the film, Anthony interacts with his closest business associate Tom (Mark Wood) via phone. Tom helps Anthony complete a series of complicated harrowing tasks at a baffling speed. How fast you ask? Before Anthony can even finish telling Tom what to do next he has done it. Accessing bank accounts, breaking into buildings, putting hookers in cars, basically, Tom is a modern avant-garde superman (which may be giving Tom too much credit). Without giving away any spoilers (I’m not sure I could spoil this movie any more than the product has done for itself) Tom is loyal to a fault. So much so that while watching it I couldn’t help but make the noise Tim Allen makes as Tim the Tool Man Taylor in Home Improvement, Huh?!?

Just about every character in this film is an awful human and you’re not rooting for anyone (except maybe Peterson’s ex-wife who doesn’t even make an appearance in the film). In some cases, this can be a good thing. I think a great example of this is Don’t Breathe, my loyalties flip-flopped like crazy during that film and by the end, I was only rooting for myself. In the case of Cargo, I was watching bad guys do bad things and somehow I was still left saying “meh”.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the cinematography. In an up close and personal setting such as this, there is a plethora of artistic opportunity to be had as it relates to camera angles and filming choices. I will admit I really enjoyed some of those angle choices. Some of the up-close shots are great and you feel like you are present in the scene, and it gives the viewer a chance to really examine Anthony’s facial expressions (both the well placed and the comically out of place), as well as feel the tenseness of the situation.  My personal favorite angle was the very last shot in the film, the emotion and power were absolutely present. However, some of the camera’s panning choices made me feel like I was on a tilt a whirl but without the fun dizzy feeling, just nausea. In one particular case, Tom is driving a car with Anthony directing him via telephone. The camera begins spinning around Anthony and making turns around the cargo container. This may have been done to artistically represent the recklessness of Tom’s driving but honesty is my best policy and honestly, it just didn’t work for me.

The film’s concept itself isn’t exactly new but it is definitely interesting. There is something incredibly fascinating about watching people in tense situations up close. Watching them either conquer and rise above or wither and wilt beneath the crushing pressure of their seemingly ominous and hopeless situation. Look at films like Buried, which takes place entirely in a coffin! Or Locke, which takes place in a car. Or Phone Booth, which (you guessed it) takes place in a phone booth. Or 127 Hours, which takes place in a canyon. I could go on and on about how many amazing movies there are that has few characters take place in limited settings (cue Alfred Hitchcock films), but the point has been made. It’s an interesting concept that can certainly yield results that move the viewer in some way. But Cargo has fallen short of that goal. I will say that the ending surprised me.

All in all, this concept could have made a really cool short film. But it wasn’t short. It was long; about 50 minutes too long. So unless you really feel like wasting an hour and seventeen minutes of your life because doing just about anything else seems uninteresting to you, then go ahead and give Cargo a try. If you appreciate your time and sanity, then Car-GO somewhere else.