If IMPACT EVENT was a satire, making fun of nuclear fallout/post-apocalyptic films, it might have a leg to stand on. In a fun, campy, way – say in the theme of Sharknado or similar, it would have a life. We would laugh. We would enjoy the bizarre improv-game style theming. (Truly, can you imagine, “Let’s see… make it the apocalypse… but they’re in a haunted house… and also there are cannibals.”) But no… IMPACT EVENT seemingly believes it’s a good, legitimate film. And us audience members suffer for it.

It’s the end of the world as we know it. A meteor storm is heading for earth, and with it an unbelievable amount of radiation (we won’t question the science here). What initially appears to be an extinction level event is quickly knocked back a few pegs, as the meteors break up entering the atmosphere. This is simultaneously good news and bad news, no one is going to die from this, but now everyone is going to have to shelter in place to stay safe from the radiation. Luckily for Billy (Chris Giese), his family has been “prepping” for the apocalypse for three generations. He’s got the set up – tons of power, tons of water, tons of ammo. He invites some of his closest friends to come spend the impending apocalypse with him. Cassie (Tasha Tacosa) and Gordon (Jed Rowen) are his closest friends, and they’re both as lonely and isolated as he is. None of them have family, none of them have closer friends than each other. It’s a perfect recipe for “starting over”, just add meteors. For some reason, there are two other friends with them, Ida (Remmy Jones) and Wendy (Windy Hamilton). They appear to be sisters (there is zero resemblance). And what happens next is such a big deal I’m going to divert from the synopsis, and dedicate a paragraph to the following…

Wendy is portrayed as hard of hearing, and played by a hard of hearing actress. However, for reasons completely beyond my comprehension, no one in this scene signs with her, with the exception of Ida signing with her at the very end of the scene, poorly. There’s never any acknowledgement made directly about this, except for a scene following where Cassie mockingly signs to Billy and Gordon. There is absolutely nothing okay with the blatant ableism portrayed here. What would have gotten an okay rating from me originally just dropped to bargain basement levels. To make it worse (spoiler) Wendy is the first person to die in the film, and she dies for no reason except her own stupidity. So not only is she portrayed in a dishonest way to her truth, she’s also portrayed as being somehow “simple” or less-than. She’s a novelty character used for “street cred”, if that. Filmmakers take note – this backfires horrifically. Do not ever allow yourselves to stoop to this low.

Now that that’s out of the way, I’ll wrap up the synopsis by saying this- nothing in this movie makes sense. At any point. As a haunter myself, I laughed to see the haunt/fun house attraction being used as a fallout shelter, but that may have been the end of the joy this film brought me. Even legendary Michael Berryman didn’t save this movie, as he’s horrifically wasted in a B-storyline that leaves us with more questions than answers. Side note, he is featured on the poster. Not only is his character far too secondary or even tertiary to be on the poster, he never appears as portrayed on the posted. Another strange cameo is the Hollywood legend Margaret O’Brien, as a character that even now, immediately after viewing the film, I cannot explain the reason for.  

IMPACT EVENT had the potential for topical greatness. As it began, I had hopes. But with each plot twist and “moment” thereafter my hopes turned into doubts and even fears… and not in a fun horror movie way. This movie plays far too fast and loose with disabilities, mental illnesses, addiction, and science. Even our female lead, Cassie, a woman of color, has the double whammy of being portrayed as dumb (constantly using the wrong names/words for things, as the guys correct her) and as being a ward of the foster system, hence her not having a family. Subtle sexism and racism seem to be the name of the game, with ableism sprinkled on top just for fun. Gordon is ex-military, and has the prerequisite drug addiction to go along with it. Suffice it to say, the stereotypes seem to be the only “solid” thing about this film… the story doesn’t have half as much conviction as the blatant bigotry that abounds.

IMPACT EVENT is a major disappointment. It absolutely blew the potential it may have had for cheap shots and cheap laughs. There’s nothing remotely scary once you get past the vaguest concept of the subject matter, which again, sounds like it was chosen by pulling themes out of a hat. While I normally try to see the good in every film, and I am as always thankful that the cast and crew was able to work, there is nothing redeeming about IMPACT EVENT.

Trigger Warning: There is a warning for this at the beginning of the film, but I would be remiss not to mention there is extensive use of strobe lights in this film. Warning for my photosensitive buddies, avoid this one. Warning for everyone else, maybe you should too.

1/10 stars