I believe I was promised rioting in the street…What up people!?!

Spoilers and big disappointments ahead…..

(No Glen and Michonne…don’t give it away yet!!!…allow me…)

Darryl was shot: to begin with.  There is no doubt whatever about that.  The blood splattered upon the camera lens.  We heard the haunting voice of Dwayne say “You’ll Survive.”  The fade to black occurred. Old Darryl most definitely has been shot.

But before we get to that we have a whole series of unfortunate events to get through.

Bullet hole in a windshield and blood on a spike.  “Come on out!”  “I don’t think so” Dripping gas…opening credits (or as I like to call it The Walking Dead’s poormans Deadpool opening)

(Cue “She’s Leaving Home”, by The Beatles)

Carol is packing all her survival gear and hiding it under the bed for her middle of the night escape.  They aren’t going to explain how she got past everyone on guard duty, steal a car from their defenses around the gate and drive off without anyone knowing anything.  But hey we already accept that Rick and Michonne just “Fell into bed” together one day so I guess they think we’ll just buy anything they explain away in a few sentences (and YES I mean you lazy writers, and YES I have more to discuss with you later in this episode!)

Speaking of Richonne or Michik (still not sure which one I like better) they are basking in the “goodness” or how everything is, how everyone in the town came through and is ready to fight, how wonderful it is to (awkwardly) share an apple while cuddling naked in bed. Glen and Maggie’s shower what appears at first to be a way to inject more forced actor naked intimacy actually represents a chance for Glen to discover now badly bruised Maggie has become with all the recent pregnant lady Rambo near misses.

Meanwhile, Darryl is really pissed about Zoe (I mean Denise…darn it) as he clutches the Dennis keychain she had found on their drugstore run. So, on his newly recovered bike, with his newly recovered crossbow, he sets out to avenge her.

Rosita (who I actually feel bad for) is forced to watch Abraham continue flirting with Sasha. When Glen and Michonne decide they better go after Darryl and bring him back, she basically tells Abraham to cover her guard shift (she is the only one who knows where he went anyhow) and out the Alexandra gates they go too.

Right about then Rick is informed by Tobin about Carol’s escape and after the requisite “I didn’t see anything…did you see anything?” moment with Sasha (who obviously sucks on watchtower duty.) Rick suddenly notices another car is missing and is told about the Darryl situation, so he and Morgan grab a car and head out after Carol anyway.  Now if you are keeping score that leaves an amazingly low number of people who can actually fight (and more to the point that we really care about on the Alexandria Compound home front.  That won’t be a problem with the season finale next week will it?!?!?)

Back on the road we see Carol driving a car with spikes jutting out of it driving as fast as she can away from the compound.  Sure there is another truck on the road heading towards her…nothing strange about that is there?  Of course it’s no surprise either when the bullet rips through the windshield and passenger seat as well.  When her tire is blown out and she has to stop, Carol clutches the rosary she has so effectively utilized in her victim act and turns on the tears again.  She claims to be Nancy from somewhere around there and just wandering around.  The sniper on the back of the truck doesn’t believe her either and gives us two very valuable pieces of information, they not only know about the Alexandria compound, they know all about their defenses as well.  But that’s really all we get to know before Carol using a gun hidden up her coat sleeve blasts most of them away before they can get a single shot off.  And the only real mistake she has made is leaving one of them alive with a single shoulder bullet wound.  He picked up her rosary and heads out after her.

And this dear writers, is where I would like to pause for a moment and reflect on how much Carol’s sudden bout of conscience has peeved me.  Because she is a stone cold bad-ass.  KILLED her own because they were sick and BURNED the bodies, MADE Lizzy look at the flowers.  Do you remember?  You made her one of the most interesting characters by taking her from abused housewife and frightened mother to the survivalist who did the difficult killing no one else was willing to.  AND NOW she feels bad about killing just to set off a mass exodus from the safety of the compound?   You really should punch each other’s privates (HARD) just because it would be as equally unmotivated.   I get that characters evolve…but no…  And I joke…you know I love and appreciate what you have brought to this show, and someday soon we are going to be laughing together about this over Tequila shots, but for right now… “junk” punches to each other for this Carol crap!  (silent watching you gesture)

Meanwhile back out on the road…

Even Rick admits that now he would have killed the sick folks in the Prison to Morgan, who by the way, confesses to the whole “I hid a pet Wolf in the basement jail and had a fight with Carol” thing, and claims it was for the better good since the wolf escaped and took Denise hostage, and yet saved her from the walkers so that she could save Carl.  Which doesn’t even work in pretzel logic land (lets go to the chalkboard and diagram shall we?)  If she hadn’t been called over to care for the wolf that shouldn’t have been in the basement, she would have been in the clinic and out of harm’s way most likely anyhow, and not a captive out in the middle of the walker invasion through the failed part of the wall and…Look to make this short, it’s a stupid argument, a strange confession, and ends with Morgan sending Rick back to the compound while he continues the hunt for Carol, but with a very solemn warning to Rick…”If I don’t come back, don’t come looking for me” and with Rick realizing the one and only truth about the Saviors he has had all season…he didn’t finish a fight with them, he just started it.

Glen, Michonne, and Rosita do catch up to Darryl.  Glen makes a very impassioned plea for him to return to the compound and figure this out together.  Michonne even swears she will be a part of making it right and taking Dwayne out.  But Darryl doesn’t listen and Rosita goes with him, leaving a very disappointed Glen and Michonne to return to Alexandria together.

Rick returns to his impenetrable death star, sorry gated master planned community where he confidently awaits the inevitable return of all his family with Abraham….

Anyway, somewhere along the line Dwayne and the survivors have learned how to pop out from behind trees ala Scooby Doo because they are able to easily capture Michonne and Glen, and then Darryl and Rosita when they try to rescue them (Rut Roh!!) And that’s where Darryl gets shot (and his blood covers our broken 4^th wall camera..which is why we can’t have nice things in the apocalypse by the way!)

Now can Darryl survive?  Dwane’s haunting voice seems to indicate so as we fade to black.  Eugene did last week.  Heck, Glen did earlier this season with about 50,000 walkers around him by hiding under a dumpster.    But we have to wonder how many of these “miraculous” near death twist escapes the series can endure before it loses that magic feeling that anyone (except Rick) can die at any moment.  A little something to ponder while you prepare your pitchforks and torches for the Darryl is dead riots that should be happening around the country.

AND oh yeah….Maggie doubled over in pain as something is obviously WAY wrong with her baby right now…Negan has finally made his appearance in the preview for next week, and I think this strange wrestle-mania style build up to the battle royal with the survivors is just about over, and our long dark bleak spring and summer wait is about to begin.