“This isn’t going to end well,” an unknown voice promises at the beginning of the film, The Midnight Man. He’s not wrong.

The Midnight Man had many of the components of a good film with its decent production value cast upon a diverse backdrop. The noble attempt of the filmmakers fell flat, however, with spotty acting, cringe-worthy dialogue and two of the most disagreeable protagonists I’ve ever had the displeasure of watching.

A young couple leaves their home in Los Angeles in order to work on their marital problems in the mountains near Big Bear – as per the advice of their marriage counselor. Their constant fighting and sometimes shrill back and forth play a major and (unfortunately) constant theme throughout the duration of the film.

Each member of this couple (from hell) have done wrong in the relationship, from Jessica’s frivolous spending habits to Kyle’s gambling they really are the hallmark of what not to do in a marriage. But I digress. Kyle has found himself in some trouble with a loan shark who is now after him. Luckily for him, Jessica decides to lock away the phones and hide the key leading to a forced, but a slightly comedic montage of him trying to break into the phone safe.

While ‘enjoying’ each other’s blissful company and attending to some marital exercises they come across an old man who warns them that someone is out to kill them. Not letting the ramblings of a lunatic scare them, this happy couple doubles down for a nice night in and a double dose of Xanax for Jessica. Before the drugs could take hold, Jessica suggests they play a little game: The Midnight Man. They each grab candles and begin to ‘play’ by attempting to summon the Midnight Man. In this version of the feared Urban Legend, each player calls upon the Midnight Man and invites him in, knocks on the inside of their front door seven times, opens the door and blows out the candles.

After their little game, Jessica welcomes the effects of her Xanax and falls into a deep sleep, Kyle comes face to face with the figure that had been silently watching them for two days. Turns out, the figure was just Billy (Tony D. Czech), an actor Jessica had paid $500 to somehow (and I still don’t understand the logic in this) scare Kyle and somehow rebuild their relationship.

While Kyle and Jessica decided to air out their dirty laundry in front of Billy, the lights go out and one-by-one they are knocked unconscious. Kyle comes to and finds himself strapped to a chair with the Loan Shark’s accountant, Hamilton (Ken Foree) in front of him to collect on his debt.

At this point, there had been almost no indication of any Midnight Man activity, and there still wouldn’t be for another 30 minutes. The filmmakers may have fared better by skipping on the Midnight Man plot point and using Hamilton as the film’s main villain.

I don’t normally root for the villain, but I found myself just hoping he’d get it over with. The film’s sluggish pace and the sheer fact that no action, suspense, terror or even a good jump scare occur until the film’s pivotal end made it a slow and often painful experience.

The Midnight Man suffered from inconsistencies in tone, from the constant passive aggressive bickering yoyo-ing with the passion between husband and wife, Kyle (Tommy Day Carey) and Jessica (Wendie Weldon) and the snarky and sometimes (almost) slapstick-worthy dialogue, I was left unsure if Midnight Man identified as a Horror film or Comedy. The problem is that while it seems as though the filmmakers were going for a dark satire, there was no definite pull in either direction, leaving the film in a dreary purgatory.

Ken Foree’s performance was the only good thing about the acting in this film. He engages with his cool yet unpredictable demeanor. I wish I could say the same for the other actors. Their performances at times fell flat. The film’s premise revolves around these two horrible individuals trying to work out their relationship with the Midnight Man playing a small, SMALL role in their therapy.

I have to admit, I was disappointed. The Midnight Man urban legend can be cruel and grotesque; the perfect recipe for a good horror film. The filmmakers used a ‘Kids Bop’ version of the story to give their “Maury Show”-worthy couple a horror facelift. I was left feeling like the film was incomplete and inconsistent – Ken Foree or even the notoriously malicious entity could not attract my attention or my care.